Susan Narjala
Keeping it Real
Give A Little Deeper
In the last three years, particularly after we moved to India, I’ve met some incredibly generous people.
I’ve met a woman who gave up a lucrative career to open a school for children of construction workers. I’ve met a doctor, now counselling abused women at a shelter home – for zero money. I’ve met a couple who run tailoring courses to empower girls from victimized backgrounds. I’ve met young men who’ve made it their life’s work to educate the underprivileged.
The one common thing among all of them (other than a heart of love) is the huge risk they’ve taken.
They are regular people. They have grocery bills to pay and kids to put through college. They like eating out and would love to go on holiday to exotic destinations. But they focus on giving – and they give without counting the cost.
Perhaps, the rest of us can’t switch careers or start non-profits. But there is more we can do than just look on admiringly.
The most obvious way we can help these risk-takers is by pitching in with our resources.
Yet, often times, we’re content to give from our leftovers. We want to check off the social service box, feel a little better about ourselves and, then, get on with life.
The other day, an acquaintance who runs a rescue home for abused and trafficked girls received a call from a leading Indian software company. They had their end-of-year gift all packed and waiting for my friend’s non-profit to pick up.
The non-profit’s vehicle was sent halfway across town to pick up the supposedly magnanimous gift from the bigwig company.
When the team at the shelter home open the gift box of donations, they discover that it was mostly junk. Pile after pile of discards. Clothes that were torn. Used underwear. Things that the rest of us wouldn’t touch with a barge pole. Yet, somehow, it was deemed “good enough” for the less fortunate.
The girls in that particular shelter home come from horrifically abused backgrounds. They wrestle with a deep sense of unworthiness. They struggle to understand what love looks like. The last thing they need is tattered clothing that only reinforces their sense of shame.
Let that sink in for a moment: The last thing they need is tattered clothing that only reinforces their sense of shame.
This is not a unique case. My husband’s family helps run an orphanage – and their house always has a box or two of donations. While much of it is well-intentioned giving, a lot is also people getting rid of trash. The boxes sometimes reek a particular smell. It’s the smell of unwanted. It’s a smell that orphaned girls shouldn’t be breathing in.
The next time we want to give to a cause, let’s give well. Let’s not use non-profits as a dumping ground for our trash.
No, our gifts don’t have to be expensive. They don’t even have to be new. But think of the person who might be using our gifts – let’s keep in mind her dignity and value. Put a face where there might be an emotionless label or an organization’s name.
Maybe we should take the Marie Kondo principle and do a 180 with it: give away things that might “spark joy” in someone else’s life.
Let’s come alongside those who have taken the big risks. We may not be called to do anything revolutionary. But, maybe, we can all risk thinking a little deeper about our giving.
Pic credit: Sean Kowal, Unsplash
MEET SUSAN
Comments
14 Comments
Leon Hampton
What an appropriate topic & how in-tune with the times you are to mention Marie Kondo and her trademark slogan “spark joy”.
My mother was a missionary in Africa during the 1980s & 90s. She recalled her fellow missionaries once receiving a gift box which contained USED tea bags.
I heard that donation centers are awash with donations; they call it the “Marie Kondo Effect”. Unfortunately, most of the donations are junk.
The giving is not all altruistic, however. In the USA, the government allows people to reduce their taxable income by the value of their donations, thereby reducing their taxes. People essentially are lying by saying their donation is of value for tax purposes while giving junk.
I’m reminded of the O.T. scriptures in which God condemns the people for offering blind, lame or sick animals as offerings. God says try offering that to, essentially, someone you’re trying to impress. (Mal 1:8)
I appreciated your suggestion,
“think of the person who might be using our gifts – let’s keep in mind [their] dignity and value.” Amen.
We are all made in God’s image, even the least fortunate of us. And Christ died for sinners, which includes all of us.
Respectfully,
Susan Narjala
Thanks, Leon! Used tea bags! That takes junk to a whole new level. Yes, I completely agree – we are all made in His image and whatever we do for “the least” we do for God. Thanks for sharing.
Marcia Rigamonti
Chaz and I try to give to the point that it “hurts” a little. One of our children said one time they thought giving to missions was a waste. I said, “ Dad and I like to think that we are paying that person to do something we wish we could be doing!”
Susan Narjala
Amazing! I love that example, Marcia!
Dr Margaret Thomas
Well said, Susan! We need to remember that the very essence of donating is ‘giving with a good heart’. Giving, to make a difference. It defeats the purpose otherwise.
Susan Narjala
You’re absolutely right, Dr Margaret! We should be giving to bless – otherwise it’s more about us than about the person receiving our gift.
Saraswathi
Susan, you have dealt with a touchy problem in such a lovely manner. One of the schools that had collected things for our NGO the previous year, didn’t want to do it this year simply because we gave them a list of things that we require.
Susan Narjala
Uugh! Just don’t understand that! (Btw, you’re indirectly referred to in my post – hope you saw that :))
Randolph
Susan, thank you so much for sharing this. This is so very true and I pray people will listen.
For many years (almost a decade) while I was working at a large well known company I ran a warm clothing drive to benefit a local homeless shelter during winter. As I sorted through the donated items to box them up for delivery, I was saddened by what was “donated”. Things from very dirty underwear to well used blankets that were obviously from a pet. I had to throw out that stuff as it wasn’t going to benefit them. The rest of the clothing, blankets, coats, hats, etc were in great new or used condition but the rest were useless. Even from our meager circumstances or if someone is in not so meager circumstances, may we give our best always and nothing less.
Susan Narjala
Thanks for sharing, Randy! It can be appalling how “generosity” is actually a front for “dumping.” Hopefully, some awareness will change this!
Aashi
Such a thoughtful post! Thank you Susan.
Susan Narjala
Thanks, Aashi!
Angela
Love this! My husband and I have collected donations for various places over the years and some of the “donations” are just disgusting. It’s so disrespectful to those we say we are trying to help. Yes! Let’s do a 180° change and give things that spark joy or are at least a blessing you would want to receive!
Susan Narjala
Thanks, Angela! That’s just so sad…but, hopefully, awareness can change things slowly.