Growing up, I attended a strict Catholic school in South India. For 12 years, I wore a school uniform of the prescribed length, socks that were modestly high enough to pass inspection, and startlingly bright white canvas shoes.

My whole modus operandi in school was pretty simple. It wasn’t to get good grades. It wasn’t to shine in extracurriculars. And believe me when I say it wasn’t to win medals in sports (I didn’t and still don’t like breaking a sweat).

My MO was simple: Don’t get into trouble.

Getting into trouble didn’t mean sitting in a detention room like I see in Hollywood movies. In the 80’s and 90’s in India it meant standing out in the playground in the sweltering summer sun with your head cowed in shame because you hadn’t done your Math homework. It meant having a blackboard duster being flung in your direction. It meant being marched off to the Principal’s office.

Speaking of Principals, I quaked in my white canvas shoes every time I saw Sister Bernadine (name changed) or “Berny” as we girls “affectionately” called her. Thinking about it now, she was less than 5 feet tall and younger than I am now. But, man, she was scary.

Fear coursed through my veins when I saw Benny doing her “rounds.” And it wasn’t a good or healthy kind of fear that one should accept and validate.

It was a “I don’t want to be punished” type of fear. That fear kept me from fully being myself. That fear relegated me to the sidelines. That fear kept me believing that I need to stay under the radar.

Don’t worry, this is not a free therapy session for me to process my childhood trauma.

Today I would love for us to make a distinction between fearing the Lord in a way that is right and good and obedient. And being fearful of God because we entertain a broken and flawed view of Him.

I John 4:18 says this: There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Friends, We can receive God’s love fearlessly.

Why?

Why don’t you and I—broken people, messed up individuals, sinners—need to be scared before a holy and perfect God? When someone like me was so scared of standing before a school principal, how is it that we can receive God’s love fearlessly?

It’s because His love is not based on our performance.

And therefore, we don’t need to fear punishment.

Have you stopped to consider the freedom you have in Christ?

In fact, the passage says that “we will have confidence on the day of judgment.”

We can stand boldly before a Holy God on judgement day because of—and only because of— His perfect love and not our performance.

If you and I had to prove ourselves by our actions and our words, and the toughest parameter—our thoughts—we would never qualify for God’s love. Honestly, if someone made an Instagram reel that somehow translated my thoughts in the last three hours, I would never have the courage to write a blog post again.

Apart from God, we are nothing. Apart from God’s love, we are prisoners to our performance. We would be constantly striving to prove ourselves. And we would be constantly in fear that we don’t have what it takes.

But instead of punishing us, Jesus bears our punishment.

And therefore, we get to receive God’s love fearlessly.

Do you find yourself in “convent school mentality” mode?

Do you find yourself buying into the performance lie?

Do you think that you need to somehow reach that perfect standard to be worthy of God’s love?

Or can we come before Him with confidence today and on the day of judgment because He is love?

May we recognize today that we have tried to perform for God, perhaps even outperform other Christians with our ministry or our good works. May we rest in Jesus’ finished work on the cross to which we can add nothing. And as we receive and rest in this fearless love, may we respond with a fierce love for God and others.

 

 

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