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When you’re thankful for a root canal

This morning I got on the scales like I do every morning. And the blessed thing registered that I was two pounds heavier. For once, I didn't swear off chocolate, processed food and every calorie that ever lived for the rest of my life. I was just happy to be doing something routine. The last few days have been boderline ...

Warning: Birthday Party Ahead

The things we do for our offspring. Like last morning, I sloshed my way through an Oregon downpour for the sole purpose of buying a Hot Wheels track for the kid's friend's birthday party. It was after my workout - I was in my sweats, my eyeliner had streaked down my face and I smelled like a bouquet of ...

Mommy Marketing 101

"What's for dinner tonight?" "Rice and chicken curry." "Ooohhh nooo." The sighs, pouts and slumped shoulders that accompany said conversation are Oscar worthy. Drama comes a leetle too easy to some folk these days - especially when they're under four feet tall and their chief concerns in life revolve around ... nothing. It seems that the more I labor over meals, the ...

Parenting Prayers for the New Year

Resolutions - we all know they last for about 21.5 days, if we're lucky. After that, the manifesto to get off our derrières, devices and dependencies becomes a distant dream. (Yup, this blog is called Alliteration Alley for a reason ;)) We start the year shopping for Kale for our green Vitamix smoothies that are so going to revolutionize our lives. By the ...

11 Reasons Why Winter is Not All Woe

Brian Williams' puppy-dog eyebrows furrow further as as the mercury plunges. He announces the arrival of winter in apocalyptic, gloom-and-doom tones on the evening news. You'd think we're all stuck in a permanent Fargo. Winter, I believe, has an unfairly bad rap. Admittedly, I'm spoiled by living in a snow-shovel-free zone of the Pacific Northwest, so the list is ...

So, about the Common Core…

Everyone’s griping about near impossible Common Core curriculum. In some circles, the term has become a choice expletive. You hear harassed moms shaking their fists and venomously muttering the phrase under their breath. In my limited experience,  it should probably be renamed “63 Inane Ways of Doing Simple Addition” curriculum. Sometimes the curriculum dictates that my first grader to do ...

Mommy Meltdown

It's been one of those days. The last straw was glass-splintering-decibel-level screaming from downstairs JUST as I sat down on the metaphorical throne to pee. I run out, barely even done, only to find the kids feverishly yelling from one floor down - asking if Missy M could eat rice with her hands. I blow up. I ...

16 Things Every New Parent Will Discover

Last week, the husband's brother and wife (to clarify, his brother's wife!) had a precious baby girl. She's far away in India and while we wish we could squish her and eat her cheeks up, we have little choice but to be content with Skype chats and pictures. Huberoo has been dispensing free advice to the newly-minted parents - fulfilling ...
MEET SUSAN

I love words. But you probably figured that out by now, considering this website essentially collates my words on the web. Read More…