Earlier this week, a record played in my ear. A record of my regrets. Some of them were of the ‘silly’ variety. Some were more serious.

I regretted that I wasn’t more disciplined with my diet before my 25^th college reunion this weekend.

I regretted that I had yelled at my teenage daughter for “disrespecting” me when really it was more about my emotions being out of whack that day.

I regretted buying something that I didn’t need just because… helloo.. Prime Day.

I regretted that I have been too screen-addicted the last few years and I haven’t connected enough with my kids who will leave the nest soon.

Like I said, a mix of silly and serious.

But carrying the weight of these regrets (and a few others) in my heart proved debilitating. It’s exhausting trying to live a normal routine when there’s a heavy backpack on your shoulders. It often feels like some of those decisions and choices can’t be undone. Like I’ve written a sentence of shame for myself. There’s little wiggle room in the trap of self-condemnation.

And I’m sure we all have regrets that hold us back from living a full and fruitful life. When we look back on the paths we’ve taken and the decisions we’ve made, we see mistakes. Our regrets come in all shapes and sizes—from XXXL to petite size 0.

When I watch celebrity interviews on social media, I often hear them say, “I live my life without regrets.” It seems freeing, but that kind of dismissal of the past is not cathartic. We don’t want to sweep our mistakes under the rug because sooner or later, it will trip us up.

But God reminds us in Romans 8:28 that in ALL things He works for the good of those who love Him who are called according to His purpose.

God works all things out—including our silly and our serious mistakes—for our good and His glory.

He releases us from the vat of regrets that we find ourselves stewing in.

How does this redeeming work happen?

I’d like to suggest two thoughts God laid on my heart.

Firstly, He urges us to go to Him in repentance and He wipes the slate clean. For instance, I needed to humble myself for losing my temper with my daughter. I needed to go to God to say I’m sorry for giving in to uncontrolled and unreasonable anger and I needed to go to my daughter and say that I’m sorry for losing the plot. It’s simple but not easy. True repentance involves a broken and contrite heart. And God who sees all things, including our hearts, is faithful to forgive our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. The enemy will likely continue to point an accusing finger at you. But hold on to the truth that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. No matter how deep your past sin goes, His grace runs deeper.

God uses our repentance to redeem our regrets.

Secondly, God urges rest in Him because He is in control. Often, we regret the choices we made in the past. But we forget that we were—and continue to be —limited and flawed human beings who had no idea how those choices would turn out. Many of us live in a minefield of “I should have” and “I could have.” I should have taken that job. I could have moved to another country. I should have married a richer guy with a better job. I should have raised my kids to be more successful. But in response to the refrain of shoulda’s and coulda’s, God says, “It’s okay because I did.”

Friends, Jesus did. He took all our mistakes on the cross so you and we can rest in Him. Rest from needing to be in control. Rest from trying to author your own story. Rest from trying to do it all, fix it all, handle it all. Rest from striving to redeem your past.

God uses our rest to redeem our regrets.

Let’s not rehearse our regrets so it plays like a mocking refrain in our minds.

The call for us is to repent and to rest so that we can live the full and fruitful life God has in store for us.

 

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