I just can’t get the hang of Twitter. Maybe it’s my Facebook addiction. Maybe it’s some kind of Twitter conspiracy. Or perhaps it’s unadulterated laziness.
Whatever the reason, I’m going to fake tweet on my blog.
Seems like if I throw some hashtags in, it might seem pretty legit. So #heregoes,
Twitter should make hyphens compulsory. #runonphrasesthatareimpossibletodecipher would be easier for to understand if they are modified to #Run-on-phrases-that-are-impossible-to-decipher. Yup, #dashes-rule
I get on the scales after hitting the gym four times this week. I’m two pounds heavier. #Go figure. (Like literally. There goes my figure – or what’s left of it.)
Love is Friday nights on the couch with the hubby, binging on Netflix and empty carbs. #vegging-out-without-vegetables
If you want a kid to laugh just throw in the word ‘underwear’ into any conversation. #works-every-time
Green tea for weightloss is like an awesome idea. Till you have your first sip of it. #coffee-for-life
Sometimes the most creative thing I do all week is color sorting the family’s laundry #rose-tinted-glasses
Dear DVR, Thanks for ruining the 2-minute conversations between the hubbers and I during commercial breaks. When do you expect we have our heart to hearts? #first-world-problems
Every now and then I like to challenge myself. Like, “Can I finish this entire bag of Ghirardelli chocolate chips before the end of this show?” #DingDingDing
Random is such a convenient, all-encompassing, random word. #RandomThought
Why is it that every time the conversation turns to head lice, my head feels like the whole Amazon is crawling through it. #elementary-school-woes
Giada should be in a toothpaste commercial. I can just hear her say, ‘Aquafresh’ in a fake Italian accent. #skinny chefs don’t rock
I’ve done Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred at least 30 times. Nothing’s changed. Maybe she should add that it 30 sessions across 365 days doesn’t really lead to shredding.
